GPS (God's Protection Service)

I am directionally challenged. I admit it. And I'm not ashamed. 

There was a time, years ago, when I desired to tackle this weakness of mine. So I enlisted the help of my "very directionally UN-challenged" husband. He enjoyed quizzing me as we'd drive down city streets and he'd casually ask "are we going North or South?" He'd try to educate me with little tidbits like "the sun rises in the east and sets in the west." After a while, I accepted the fact that I simply prefer to rely on mapquest, navigator and/or the cadillac of all systems - GPS - to get me to where I was going.

Panic On the Highway

However, I realized that just like human beings, an apparatus created to help direct you can sometimes fail and  get you lost anyways. This past weekend, I took my daughter to a basketball tournament about 50 minutes away. My husband normally drives us, but because he had another obligation, I was the traveling pilot for the day. Although I had heard of the city we needed to be in (Peshtigo) and knew it was not too far away, I still had no idea what direction we were to go once we left our driveway.

My handy-dandy navigating system got us started in the right direction. All was fine until about 30miles in. There was a fork in the highway, and my navigator decided to lock up. The last direction I remembered seeing was 'exit 192a' and 'follow to Crivitz/Marinette'. What caused me great doubt was when the fork to the left said 'crivitz' and the fork to the right said 'marinette'. What????? I made a quick decision and stayed right, because to go left was taking exit '187', and I hadn't come upon 192 yet.

As I drove,  daughter fast asleep in seat next to me, I saw signs that let me know 3 different cities were ahead. None of which were Peshtigo!  Panic quietly set in, as I realized her game started in 20 minutes. Further doubt crept in to my already-panicked mind as I came upon exits 195, 196, and 197!.  Where on earth was exit 192??

Thankfully, in a final ditch effort, I called another parent who was already at the gym. To my utter surprise, it turned out I WAS going the right direction and he verbally gave me directions to our destination.  We got there in just the nick of time.  Whew! 

Lesson learned:  have a back up plan (i.e. map quest directions) and worst case scenario - know how to read a map!

Not Afraid to Venture Out

This little incident brought back a memory of a time 2 years ago, when I was alone in Denver Colorado for a weeklong training event.  I got a rental car and a nifty GPS unit that came along with it. This experience was completely opposite to the one mentioned above.

I am an explorer by nature; I will seek out adventure - even when I'm by myself - simply because I believe "I may never pass this way again." So after my 5 day training wrapped up, I chose to venture out to a place I had read about in a magazine called "Red Rock Amphitheatre".  My GPS told me I'd be there in about 25 minutes; my expedition had begun.

During the week of training, I had driven back and forth from the hotel to the training site,and to different restaurants during the week where I had met friends from back home (who now resided near Denver). Each trip was a piece of cake, as I trusted the GPS to get me to where I was going. It was slick! And, dare I say it, I think I looked like a native of the city as I drove with efficient ease.  No fears. No worries. My little rented device was reliable and never steered me wrong. 

So here I am, all alone on Denvers 7 lane highway, pedal to the metal and feeling confident as I headed to the mountains.The thrill of seeking a new adventure was as exciting to me as checking out a new rollarcoaster ride at an amusement park.  I got to the amphitheatre and, my oh my, was it GLORIOUS!  I remember feeling so thankful for venturing out here on my own, and not being afraid to do so. I might have missed this magnificent place!

God's Protection Service

It occurs to me,  that it's like that with God.  When we have complete faith and trust in Him, He will help us navigate through lifes twists and turns, and get us back on track when we try to go our own way, and take a detour.  Trusting God and having faith in Him, does not mean there will never be roadblocks. But we can rest assure that His Word is the ultimate best as far as giving us directions in life. Most of us will make wrong turns, or go down roads that we were never meant to travel.  But if we surrender ourselves back in to God's care, He will re-route us in the direction that gets us to where our true purpose in life is. So -  no longer do I refer to a gps as a "global positioning system" but rather "God's Protection Service"  to remind myself that He is the true direction in my life.  His battery will never fail,  His system will never lock up and His "model" will never become outdated.   I can trust Him.  I don't have to doubt when the road signs don't make sense.  And as far as adventure goes, Life with Him is the wildest ride I've ever had!

Operation: Muffin-Top Reduction

 If you are a Seinfeld fan, you may remember the episode where Elaine and Kramer decide to go in to business selling ONLY the tops of muffins, because, as we all know, that's the best part! I can relate  to this because I did this very same thing all the time, to the great dismay of my mother. She'd come home to the "bottoms" of the muffins being left in the muffin tin.  Now, as it relates to the accumulation around my middle (especially after hitting the big 4-0), le'muffin top is no longer seen as 'the best part'. I remember taking a Pilates class once, and the instructor referred to our 'middle section' as "upholstery". I thought it was funny to define our excess as a type of fabric!

Muffin Top Prepare For Battle

So like many other Americans, I resolved to make some changes in the new year and declared that my own muffin top should prepare for battle. I was tired of how snug my clothes had become and how my blouses had started to accentuate my ' upholstery'. After all, I am just your average 45 year old, middle-aged mother of 2, with a busy life. (Did I mention I graduated from college with a degree in Corporate Fitness and at one time - pre children - I was teaching up to 12 aerobic classes a week?). Where, oh where, did my healthy figure go? I had good intentions to create a separate blog, sharing daily entries about my journey. But now that I'm already 41 days in to the project, maybe a simple entry to 'this' blog will suffice.

 My weight gain had crept on so subtley over the years, and before I knew it, I was carrying around an extra 30 pounds on my frame.  For a time I would blame it on the dreaded over forty rumors, where everyone warned me that my metabolism would come to a screeching halt! And let's not forget about how the hormones start to go hay wire.  Why on earth is hair starting to grow on my chin?  (now I understood where the phrase 'not by the hair of my chinny chin chin' came from.)  One day as I looked at myself, almost naked, in a clothing store changing room, I thought "I have done this to myself".  The extra rolls that were staring me back in the mirror came, simply, from two things:  1)  No longer exercising regularly and 2) overeating.  Plain and simple. Hormones S'moremones.  I had done this to myself and had gotten too comfortable with my less-active lifestyle.  My extra upholstery, to be truthful, came from too much of one thing (food) and not enough of another (exercise).  If I was going to prepare for battle, it was time for me to GET REAL!  No more excusing away what I knew needed to be done.  So,  the "Operation Muffin Top Reduction" project began on January 4, 2013.

Battle Mantra 'Just Do It!'

I am a big believer in tracking progress by writing things down.  Although it is always helpful to write down what you eat in a food log,  I prefer to track different things that I desire to work on.  For me, I am motivated to track my exercise, how much water I drink in a day and one new weekly goal each week. In my notebook, I not only write the date but also, what day it is on my journey.  Today marks day 41 for me.  This reminds me that ALL progress is gradual.  It takes time.  I see the consistency in my workouts and realize, over and over, that this journey is a marathon; not a sprint.  The extra 30 pounds didn't come on overnight.  It's not going to evaporate overnight.  It requires work. It requires discipline. It requires finding the positive in the little things, and using those little things to motivate you to continue in the process.

If I had a dollar for every time I repeated the Nike motto in my head ("Just Do It!"), I could afford a month's worth of Starbucks cappucinos.  In the beginning, tiredness or a 'to do list' would tempt me away from getting to the gym, but that quiet, smart voice encouraged me to 'just do it'.  Two things can be true about exercise; we never feel like going, but we always feel better afterward.  I reminded myself of this over and over.  Tape a note of encouragement to your bathroom mirror or on your car steeling wheel (or your forehead, if absolutely necessary)!  Do whatever it takes to get your butt (i.e. Gluteus Maximus) to the gym!  

Here are some words of wisdom that have encouraged me along the way:

1.  Create an accountability group with 1-4 friends that desire to make healthy changes in their lifestyle. I have 3 other friends in my group, and we call ourselves the "Slim and Sassy Sistas".  I can't take credit for all of the name, as some of us our using a product called "Slim and Sassy" for our fruit smoothies. We created a private group on facebook, so that we could 'post' anything at anytime to each other. (For example: "I went to my first cardioboxing class today, and I am one, hot sweaty mess! But I feel awesome."  Then the other members can offer kudos of encouragement) Each friday, we are to post three things: 1) Any weight loss from that previous week 2) What our new weekly goal is (to be done for 7 days) and 3) Any positives or negatives from the week.  (For example: "I ate only 2 pieces of pizza tonight at my favorite restaurant"  OR "I am struggling to not eat past 6pm.  Tell me to stop it!") I am having a blast with my group, and they do TRULY hold me accountable, especially when I tell them I need an extra kick in the pants! They come through for me:)
2. Track daily sugar grams.  An author who wrote a book on reducing belly fat, said that you should limit your sugar intake to 15 grams a day. One cup of skim milk had 12g of sugar; a can of tomato soup - 25g! Wow!  I am not legalistic about it, but I have cut down to one cup of coffee a day, to limit my flavored cream. Also, I switched to almond milk (great for smoothies) which has no sugar calories.  Read your labels. You'll be amazed to find that sugar is in almost everything, even ketsup, salad dressing, and soups, etc. 
3. Take a specialty exercise class.  I payed an extra fee for these TRX (suspension training) classes, and I confess: I love and hate these classes all at the same time.  They kick my butt, but paying for something, motivates me to get there.  I am frugal by nature, and do not like wasting money. (Next session, I am giving 'kettlebells' a try:)
4. Drink LOTS of water. Add lemon oil to enhance flavor.  Did you know that your livers primary function is to metabolize body fat?  And if your kidneys are not getting enough water each day to function at 100% efficiency, the liver wll kick in to help the kidneys do their job, thus working only partially at metabolizing fat in your body.
5. Create a weekly goal and work on that 'habit' for a full 7 days.  Be creative and honest with what you need to work on.  Here are a few examples from my log:  1)  Drink 2 cups of milk each day. 2)  Do not eat after 6pm.  3) Do 60 minutes of cardio (just for 7 days!) 4) Drink a gallon of water per day 5) Count daily sugar grams 6) Avoid drinking alcohol/wine 7) Exercise before eating first meal of the day. 
6. DO NOT to weigh yourself everyday!  Our daily weight fluctuates so often because of water intake and water retention.  There is something about weighing yourself every day that can be discouraging, especially if you are doing well on your program, and don't see a loss on the scale.  Measure your losses in other ways.  Try to pick one day a week to 'weigh in', and stick to it. And even if you only see a 1/2 pound weight loss in a week, celebrate it! Remember,  muscle weighs 3x's more than body fat but takes up less space. Also, having more muscle increases your body's metabolism so you'll burn more calories throughout the day, even while you sleep.
7. Push yourself! Even though you may have gotten your workout in for the day, do some extra repetitions of upper body exercises with dumbbells or lunges/squats while you watch your favorite tv program. Extra kudos to you if do plank/core exercises during one full commercial break. 
8. Track negative emotions in your journal. As you track your exercise, and new habits, it's very important to track negative emotions when you recognize them.  Where are they coming from?  What is at the root? What do you do when discouragement comes?  Have a positive plan in place to help keep you  from emotional eating. Go for a walk. Say a prayer. Remind yourself that you are worth it!  Write yourself  an encouraging letter that focuses on your future goals and read it as often as you need to.
9. Keep your eye on the prize. Keep a folder of inspirational, weight loss, success stories.  Read daily to keep you moving forward towards your goals and to encourage you when you feel stuck.

Keeping the Right Perspective

I am happy in my life.  Even with the excess weight, I always knew that my value was not tied  to the number on the scale.  It's important that you feel good about who you are on the inside, recognizing that weight loss does not equal happiness. My new reality includes daily cycling/cardiosculpt classes, and eating baby carrots with hummus.  My energy has returned, and slowly, but surely, I  am starting to see changes. Changes not always seen on the scale, but changes that matter.  Goodbye Muffin Top.............hello six pack abs.  (totally kidding on that last line.....:)

All Rise For The Jury

Last month, I was summoned for jury duty.  I'm 45 and this was the first time they requested me for my 'civic responsibility'!  So I head to the court house on a Monday morning, freshly caffeinated from my late night (1:30am) of movie watching ( NOT thinking I'd be selected to be a juror!).  Jury selection began upon arrival and the 60 potential jurors enter the courtroom, then only 21 are called to sit in the actual jury seats.  I was one of the lucky ones.  Funny, how I somehow  felt special.  As if to say (like Sally Fields receiving an Academy Award) "they like me.....they really like me!"  From that point, both attorneys start asking questions, trying to determine who would be a right fit for this trial.  Then, each lawyer dismisses 4 people and we are left with, viola, 13 jurors!  The judge informs us this particular trial  will last  approximately 8 days, and asks if there would  be any conflicts for us. Prior to the wave of excuses she must've expected to come, she reminded us of our current soldiers in the military, who serve our country everyday (though inconvenient for them and their families) for the very reason we were there:  having the right to a fair trial.  Excuses still came from a few, but eventually we had a solid 13 people, ready to serve!

Selection process was done and Wham! we start with the first witness.  As the day got longer,  my 'alertness' went out the door with the bailiffs. I yawned way too many times to count. And I am certain I gave the young man next to me a few chuckles as I not only nodded off, but did the ole' 'jerk shuffle' that thankfully, jolted me awake, for the next round of witnesses.  Note to self: no more late nights for me during this trial!  Each time we entered and left the courtroom, the bailiff would say "All rise for the jury".  We felt like royalty. And although initially it seemed unnecessary, I realized how serving as a juror, was a position held in high esteem, and they rose to show us their respect for serving in such an important capacity.  Being selected to 'decide on a verdict' was not something to be taken lightly.  The fate of someone else's future - was in our hands. 

As jurors, we each received a legal sized tablet of paper.  Witness after witness, the clerk of courts would ask them to raise their right hand, place their left hand on the bible and say "Do you solemnly swear that the testimony you are about to give is the truth - the whole truth - and nothing but the truth, so help you God?" During the duration of the trial, I took 30 pages of notes.  I was serious about my civic duty; no more dosing off for me.  During this trial, because of the deluge of expert witnesses, we were schooled in so many areas.  We didn't just "learn something new everyday", we learned about 40 hours worth of new stuff! Here are a few important facts that I never knew before:

• The burden of proof is on the prosecuting attorney
• Wind direction can influence an ARC map
• Lawyers can be drama queens too
• NFPA921 - is code for 'accepted engineering principles'
• When you are on the losing side of the battle, use the 'art of distraction'
• The burn patterns of a fire can be clearly documented through photos
• Too much current in a primary volt (120v) can cause the secondary volt (24v) to overheat
• Sometimes,  insurance companies do not want to pay for damages to their clients business in cases of negligence.
• Witnesses take an oath to tell the truth, but somehow skirt around it, in order to sway a decision in their favor.
• Never go the bathroom during the start of jury deliberation, or you'll be voted jury foreman 

• The ironic thing about this whole process, is that during this same time, I had been working on a writing assignment about 'forgiveness'.  Much of my information came from a book called "Total Forgiveness", written by R.T.Kendell, as well as my personal testimony in this area.   

Being in an actual courtroom - with lawyers, a judge, a juror and witnesses - really brought to light what it looks like when we hold bitterness and unforgiveness in our heart towards another person.

Many of us grew up reciting 'The Lords Prayer' in church. "Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy Name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done. On earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread.  Forgive us our debts as we have also forgiven our debtors.  And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one."  Now, this is what's interesting.  What's left out of the Lord's prayer (that we recite), are the very verses that follow. "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  BUT, if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will NOT forgive your sins. "  (Matthew 6:9-15)

How often do we ask God to forgive us for our mistakes, then turn around and justify our own unforgiveness towards another.  We hang on to an offense or grudge, because the pain of their behavior is just hard to let go. We want them to pay. They deserve our judgment.   Yet, when we don't forgive we are really saying 'God, you can just move over. I'll take it from here.' You crown yourself judge, jury and executioner, and presume to take God's place. He alone is the ONLY righteous judge. He will do right. He will clear your name. He will deal fairly with those who hurt you.

In our American court systems, we have an earthly judge.  And even though they have more knowledge of the law than probably all 12 jurors put together, they still are not the one who decides the verdict.  Instead, 12 people, of varying personality and education, make that decision.  This process caused me to examine my own past mistakes and what that would look like if every 'wrong' I ever committed was brought before a judge and a jury.  Imagine the whole court knowing my 'crime' if you will.  There is the prosecuting lawyer bringing forth all of the witnesses, testifying to the fact that "yes, I did this wrong".  And my defense lawyer would do his best to clear my name and prove otherwise.  After hearing all the facts, the jurors would decide my fate and the judge would issue my penance.  What would our punishment  look like?  In reality, when a verdict comes back as "guilty" for a crime committed, there is sentence.  You did the crime? You will do the time. There is no grace. No mercy.  In rare cases, a person may receive a pardon; which is defined as a legal transaction that releases an offender from the consequences of their action, such as a penalty or a sentence.

I think of Nelson Mandela, who is perhaps the best example in the twentieth century of a man who has taught us how to forgive.  After 27 years of political incarceration - the longest serving political incarceration - he emerged unscathed and told his people to forgive their oppressors and focus on the future and on building a new, United Nation. In spite of the devastating trauma of apartheid, Mandela chose the path of forgiveness and reconciliation rather than the policy of revenge and vindictiveness.  The world expected that a ghastly bloodbath would overwhelm South Africa, but this did not happen. South Africans managed an extraordinarily peaceful transition between governments and avoided a major ethnic and racial war.

This is what I know to be true:  When we have done something wrong, if we confess it to God with a sincere heart, and ask Him to forgive us, He will forgive us and forget our trespasses.  How amazing is that? If we are taken to court, and are convicted by a jury, our 'crime' will go on a permanent record.  It cannot be wiped away.  How thankful I am that all of my wrongdoing is not exposed for everyone to see.  And I am challenged to do the same for others; whether they ask forgiveness of me or not.  I do not want to expose them. I do not want to recite the Lord's prayer, without truly meaning what it says.  If I can't live by those words, then memorizing them serves no good purpose. I want to walk out my faith.  I want to live authentically.  Is forgiving easy? No, its hard. It can be excruciating. It can be humbling. Proverbs 19:11 says "It is to a man's glory to overlook an offense."  What if that's our reward? What if forgiving someone else is far more spectacular in God's eyes than anything else.  Reserving judgment for God alone shows that we are already beginning to forgive. 

So, in the end, I found the adventure of being a juror quite fascinating.  My fellow jurors found it amusing, too, that I wanted to go back to school to be a judge, an electrical engineer, a fire investigator, a courtroom stenographer and a bailiff (although I'm pretty sure there is on the job training to be a bailiff) lol.  Since I don't have the time or energy at this point in my life to earn all those degrees, I'll choose to live vicariously through re-runs of "Law and Order". This experience opened my eyes and made me even more thankful that God has given me more "pardons" than I can count; way more than I deserve. And that I have the best defense lawyer that there ever was; who pleads my case before a higher Judge, when I humbly ask forgiveness.  He doesn't wear a three piece suit and his gavel is saturated with grace:)

The Climb

I've come to this place in my life, at 44 years old, where internal motivation comes hard regarding exercise and fitness.  I find this ironic, since I received a degree in Health and Fitness from college, and worked for 15 years in corporate fitness. Go figure!  Still, because I KNEW I needed a swift kick in the behind to get moving, I decided to sign myself up for a duathalon (run-bike-run) this October, in my home city of Green Bay.

I'm happy to report that training has been going well!  Especially since I feel somewhat legit with a new bike, cyclometer, heart rate monitor, bike gloves, pink shades and cycling jersey.  I've gone on many long bike rides, which quite often, include having go up these wonderful things called "hills". And although I do not dread them as much as I once did, I find that the hills have taught me an important life lesson.  They are always tough, and never "fun".  But there's power in the "knowing" as I climb up that hill........that I get to enjoy the pleasure of coasting down it too. 

Sometimes life is like a long bike ride.   Sometimes the road is straight and narrow.  Sometimes the road is filled with hills and valleys. Most of the time it's a mixture of both.  How we choose to respond to those hills and valleys ultimately determines whether or not we will experience the gleeful victory ride down the hill after we've conquered it.  I have personally experienced joy in the midst of  sorrow; but only because I KNEW that God was using those valleys to bring incredible joy after the struggle.  I knew their was purpose in the pain, and I knew if I surrendered that situation (that uphill climb) to Him, one day I would get to coast down from the mountaintop.  Somehow the uphill climbs of life make us stronger and build in us an incredible endurance for the next battle that comes our way.  And when you've conquered those hills - those inevitable battles- you get to ride down it, legs out to the side, and yell at the top of your lungs, "Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" 

Love Is My Religion: Look who's artwork is in the latest Somerset Studi...

Love Is My Religion: Look who's artwork is in the latest Somerset Studi...: "Whooooo Hooooo....Look who's artwork is in the latest Somerset Studios magazine....Mine! Yipppeeeeeeeeeeee"